Posted on June 9, 2009

Lame excuses for things we know we shouldn’t do come in all shades. Some are somewhat believable, if bogus, while others are completely preposterous. The more outrageous the excuse, the more likely the person uttering it is guilty of doing, or planning to do, the act. In this case, we’re talking about the 10 lamest excuses to do drugs (or keep doing them).

1. “It helps me feel the music.” – You’ll hear this one from ravers, club-goers, adolescents and young adults who claim that doing drugs is the only way to truly appreciate the music at these locations. Another danger is that you may be feeling the music when someone slips a date rape drug into your drink, which will mean you’ll be subject to unwanted sexual advances that you’ll be powerless to resist and won’t even remember afterward.

2. “I dance better when I’m on drugs.” – Actually, the more drugs you consume, the less coordinated your body becomes, to the point of total lack of coordination and/or control. Certain drugs when consumed elevate your body temperature to the point of hyperthermia – dehydration, excessive loss of body water. You can go into convulsions, have a seizure, or fall into a coma.

3. “I know what I’m doing.” – Classic lame excuse, usually spoken by someone who feels they’re in control – when they’re clearly not, especially under the influence of powerful street drugs that impair judgment. No one really ever buys this lame excuse, so don’t even try to use it. If you really know what you’re doing, you won’t do drugs in the first place.

4. “It mellows me out.” – To a point and for a while, maybe, but drugs consumed are very often accompanied by other drugs (laced with other drugs, taken in conjunction with other drugs, etc.) and/or alcohol. Pretty soon, the user is far beyond mellow and into a whole new sphere of behavior, none of which is acceptable or healthy.

5. “What’s the big deal? I can handle it.” – The big deal is that you never know what’s actually in that ecstasy tablet you swallow, that dose of LSD you just popped, the PCP you just accepted, or any other drug you take. Every person’s body is also different in the way it can or cannot tolerate a drug without side effects or negative consequences, ranging from mild to life threatening.

6. “I’ve done this lots of times.” – That doesn’t make it right and it doesn’t make it okay for your body. You also become overconfident in your body’s ability to tolerate the drug, and you may be tempted to believe you can do more drugs and more often. Unfortunately, you never know if this may be the time that you overdose or do some serious and irreparable harm to your body and/or your mind.

7. “I won’t get into trouble.” – Who convinced you of this lame excuse — your friends that handed you the drugs, the dealer the you bought them from, someone else you know? The trouble you can get into can ruin your life, your health, your reputation and relationships. It can also land you in jail. If you use street drugs, they’re illegal. If you use prescription drugs for nonmedical uses, you’re similarly asking for trouble. And trouble will find you.

8. “Everyone’s doing it.” – Don’t be a sheep, going along with the herd. Just because others are doing bad things is a big blaring sign that you should walk the other way. Maybe you’re in the wrong circle of friends. Real friends don’t encourage you to do something so blatantly harmful. Stand up for yourself and steer clear of drugs.

9. “I’m not driving.” – Hallelujah – at least that’s one plus. But doing those drugs you’re contemplating can just as easily make you feel overconfident of your abilities. While you’re under the influence of drugs, you’re not thinking clearly, and you may snatch the keys and take off – with disastrous consequences for you, your passengers and others on the road and walkways.

10. “I don’t have school tomorrow.” – As if this is a legitimate reason to party hearty and do drugs. Don’t think anyone will fall for it. The fact that you entertain the thought that because you may be able to sleep in makes it okay to do drugs is just another sign that your mental processes are skewed. If a friend hears you say this, or if you say it to a friend, someone should have a clear enough head to turn down any drugs offered – this time and every time.